Saturday, 18th December, 2010 03:30:15pm
Name or Alias:
Training and/or processing level:
Dianetics Seminar, Com Course
Org or location:
Celebrity Center, Hollywood CA
Time involved in the Church of Scientology:
1 Month and and 15 days
Recommended Website - n/a
- 1. How did you first become acquainted with the Church of
- I was walking down the street in Hollywood Blvd and one of the auditors with a blue long sleeve shirt and black tie was making readings with the emeter on the sidewalk with a litle talbe with Dianetic books on it, he showed me how it reacted to my thougts and I was totaly facinated by it, I tought I could benefit to find out more about myself as a being. also the Idea that if I know my mind and I know other peoples minds I would be better off, since at that time I felt totally lost in this world,when he brougt me into the building and he asked me further questions I mentioned to him that I was very deppresed and I was having suicidal thoughts, he asked me if I had had any Psichiatric help, I told him no and after he showed me how the meter worked he asked me if I wanted to do some sessions to showme what Dianetics do,I agreed and we walked from that buliding where he was to another building in the same blvd, and he started doing book one auditing on me, wich worked butifly to my benefit because I got a great release out of that, we met every dary for about 3 days the sessions lasted about 1hr or hr and a half each day, the guy that was working on me was kind enought to make sure I got a release sisnce we had gotten into very serious stuff in my mind and I had a lot of pain and missemotion attached to the subjects we had touched so he did not let me go till I end up the last session with VGI's as they called. to my surprise it was all for free, he never mentioned any money, all I remember was he told me he was about to graduate and he had to prove that he was able to do it good, so now looking back the guy had realy realy good intentions to help me out, after that I felt totaly totaly great like I never felt before, I felt a lot of peace of mind and I was very happy wich I had never been before, on the last session we end up laughin wich was to me very unexpected and imidiatly I felt like I had walked up from a bad nightmare and was alive again. The auditor then told me I will bring you to my supervisor he will ask you some question, please do not ask him any questions or talk to him,if you have questions we will adress them after you see him, he brought me to his case supervisor, and the guy put me on an emeter and he asked me: Do you think dianetics works? I said yes, would you like other people to know about Dianetics? I said yes he told me your needle is floating, wich at that time I did not understand what it meant and that was that, we left the sup's room and the he brought me to Celebrity Center to meet more people (the regs) they showed me all the courses they had available and as soon as I saw Succes thru Com Course I was totaly sold on it, things were getting better and better they had more of the stuff that I desperatly needed at that time, I did not know that you had to start from the bottom up and they told me I had to do the Dianetics seminar first before I did the com course so I bought Dianecs seminar they wanted me to start at that moment, but I wanted to savor the moment that had just happened earlier after the session ended and I wanted to think about what just had happened in my last auditing session,and I told the reg I would come back the next day she agreed since I had already paid for DS. after I started the course, I noticed there was a litle rush from the sup for me to finish the course in one week, I been a very slow readyn since I was a kid and English being my second language I was thinking it my take me a litle longer that a week to read that book. but he gave me goals every day to do a chapter every day I belive it was bout 15 to 20 pages that I had to read every day I remember I was straining a lot and I told him and he told me there is a lot more to do and read and we dont have much time so you have to do it in a week.
- 2. What initially appealed to you about scientology?
- The fact that they had thechnology to approach the mind (the emeter) I never seen any body aproaching the mind with an electronic gadget and I was very interested to know more about myself and others, and like I mention before after the release I had, I was totaly sold on the whole subject at that time I tought it was only Dianetics and later on I found out more about Scientology and all the books and data avialable on the subject of the mind and the Spirit wich I was very Intereste on.
- 3. Were there problems in your life that you thought
scientology would address?
- yes I was very depressed and having suicidal toughts wich were gone after the release mentioned above, after that I still had problems comunicating with people.
- 4. Did you see, experience, or hear about things that didn't
seem right while you were in the Church of Scientology? What were
they, and what convinced you to set aside your feelings?
- After I was rushed to finish the DS, I was kind of coherced to give a winning statement at the end wich I had to invent out of the blues because I did not feel I had a real benefit from the DS being so rushed to finish it in a week, on the DS you are suppose to do co-auditing with another person. well they gave me as a co-auditor a 8 year old boy, I told the sup I dont feel confortable telling some stuff to this kind since I wanted to keep unloading a lot of garbage I had on my mind, and the sup told me he can handle it he has done it before but if you dont feel confortable I will give you sombody bigger and brought a girl of about 14 or 15 years old wich seemend to be very desinterested on listenig to what I had to say and was reading robotically from the book the auditing questions.and again I had to modify some how what I had to say since I did not feel confortalbe telling what I had ot tell to a woman or to a child. I was planing to come back and buy the Com course on my own termrs, later on I find once you are part of Scientology you do no do things in your own terms, you do things in their terms and times otherwise you are scum. I wa still very fired up from the last sessions I had had with the real auditor that after I started the com course I decided what I was going to do with my life and I decided that I would be an Auditor, but then I realize the prices are so high how am gonna do it, and the sup told me you can work for the Org and they will give you credit for the courses you need to take, so I went to the regg and I told her I wanted to work for the Org, and she told me talk to such and such, that person came out the cafeteria and we talked, I told her I totaly wanted to be and auditor, she told me if you want to work for us, there is overtime ivolved and we work from 7 am till sundown I did not know at that time sundown was 9 or 10 o'clock at night. also there was no mention of how much I was gonna make but I was happy she wante to give me a chance I did not even ask, I was assuming they were good people (wich some are except the top execs) and Im sure the pay is going to be FAIR. then she broght me into an office and there were two young guys wiht wite long sleeve shirts and black ties and he asked them if I could join they ask me some questions and they look at each other and decided that I could not join, the Lady told me sorry I can't let you join if my comrades do not want to accept you, my hart was broken I almost wanted to cry but I had to keep my dignity and walk away after they had told me I was not good enought to belong to the SO. when I was walking thru the gardens towards the parking lot the Lady came and shout my name, and she told me Im gonna give you a chance even if they dont want you in, Im gonna let you in, when can you start?,I was happy again since I wanted to join the Org I did not know at that time how the SO operated all I knew is that I wanted to be an auditor, she told me when can you start? I had a job at that time and did not wanted to burn my bridges so I told her I have to give 15 days in my job, she told me you dont have to do that she broght me back into the office, the two young guys that had rejected me earlier left showing dissapointment on their faces, so the lady gave me the fhone and told me call your boss and QUIT. I was surprised of the authority of her, she did not give me a time to think, I told her I have to think about it, she told me there is nothing to think about here is the fhone call your boss and quit. so I called my boss, I was very nervous because I know my boss would be upset when the fhone was ringing ,I told her Im very very nervous and she told me "that is him not you" I have no Idea what that meant. so she had me sign the 2 billion year contract wich I did not understand a that time I tohught I was being hired for a regular job, but two million years seemend a bit off. but anyway I signed and it says there you cannot sue them or look for retribution of nay kind and that you are voluntiering with your own will etc, etc, etc all the legal jargon basically saying that you belong to them you doing the work for free as a voluntier and you cannot sue ar look for monetary retribution of any kind. anyway I joined the SO the same day, I was happy becaus they did not put me to work immidiatly but I went instead to start the Welcome to the SO course and I was on class all afternoon he presented me with the EPF (Estate Power Force) team leader and she told me once you finish with the class report to her. at night we took the bus from Celebrity center to the sleeping quarters, I was surprised to see some of the Excecs I had seen earlier working in offices to sleep in the same old building that the other people I thougt well every body is treated equaly no big deal. I was concerned to see the opulence of the Celebrity Center contrasting witht he conditions of the Old building we were sleeping on, some people only had matresses on the floor to sleep and there were ussually 5 to six people in a room sleeping in bunk beds. while I was on the EPD I would continually hear stories about people that had been serving in other buldings we were told we did not had it bad at all in Celebrity Center since the food was made by a Cheff it was actually good food no complains about it, it was funny the EPFrs were not allowed to have fruit or desert at lunch time, olny the high rank excecs were allowed to have fruit or desert and since it was my job to set the tables and undo the tables every lunch time we would eat the left over fruit from the Excecs plates. after a while I realized that I was a long road to become an auditor and I had not even started yet. I felt I was wasting time in reading books and making courses about how to run this post or that post wich I was not interested in. later on I find out is an out of Ethics if you snoop on other books if you are not on course, so you had to read only the books for the course you are in and you are not allowed to read the good stuff. it was rush rush all the time because we had to clear earth... now after reading in the internet of people that spent 20 years in the church and did not advance in the bridge at all becouse is all manual labor all the time, Im glad I got out on time and went to the real world and got skills to get a real job.otherwise I would have waisted my time. later on I found out you cannot work as an auditor and make money unless you are part of the church and even then all the money goes to them not to you, so how am I supposed to make my living as an auditor?. Auditing works but it does not work to be an auditor if you cannot make a living out of it and live your life freely like other profesionals do. I did not like to her about how other people were stupid and ignorant out there in the real world and we have to save them that is a bit looking down on people and pretending that the church and everybody inside is better than the world out there. I did not see major drama or mistreatment of people in there since in CC must people are rich, there was a lot of young rich kids inthere, there was sombody I would not mention names but he was the son of a famous singer and was having marrige problems; thats how he came into the org and insted of fixing his marrige he was advice to divorce his wife since she did not agree with Scn. and the guys was sad cuz he had to split and joined the SO. there were people crying because they were not allowed to advance to other courses for some reason or other that seemed unfair to them. I saw one of the top female exces yield at another male excec one time in the hallway "to do what he had to do to get it done" I thougt at at that time that was a litle rough to talk to sombody that way when people in there is trying to do good, how about using a litle ARC to talk to somebody? one of the rich kids was not allowed to sleep with us in the old building where that we used as sleeping quarters and he had to pay for his own room and bord at the CC I belive his bill was bout 3k a month, only for food and a room. I saw exces get down from their exces offices put on dirty clothes and start working on manual labor painting walls or puting cleaning rooms. I was dissapointed at that, I thougt that means I will be doing manual labor no matter what, I never been strong phisically and I did not like doing manula labor, moving tables from here to there, vacuming the pavillion before an event and having people telling me I have to do it quick before the gests arrive, then I have to run back and hide because Im not supposed to be seen by the rich guests, I never expected to become the house servant, I had to do beds in the Mannor Hotel along with a bunch of girls that would not shut up because they were all pept up. one of the Lead Maids wore a Clear bracelet but her face was very unhappy and she wore sunglasses at the breakfast talbe at 7 am in the morning and she would not talk to anybody, I think she was unhappy because she was a clear and she had to vacum and do beds all day long the detail in the Manor Hotel had to be inpecable and we had to vacum every room even if it did not need to be vacum. I was very dissapointed to find out that I was making only $7.50 a week and sometimes there was no pay since the church did not reach the statistics for that month and suposedly needed them oney so we had to sacrify our 7.50 per week and go by with no pay, nobody complained because we were constantly encorages to write Knoledge Reports on each other, I was very scare of that I did not want to get in trouble. since I did not know much about the subject at the time I used to see the Exces going into the hughe dining room in the basement and close the doors and few minutes later scream WE COME BACK, WE COME BACK, WE COME BACK. I thout it was very extrange but never paid atention to that since there was nobody to ask any quesiton eventhou I was surounded by a lot of people we did not trust each other so nobody spoke about anything except frivolities or wins in this clas or that class but not questions of any kind you had to hold it in. I realized a the pace things were going that the world was never goign to be clear, that it was an imposible tasks and there were a lot of bumps and rocks in the rod and I realized I probably would die first before we would make any effect in the world at all, seeing that things did not run as smotly as I was expecting and there was a lot of mind playing going on. I was expecting to get in there work get trained and be put in the front lines to audit people just like I had been audited before. but I saw that was not going to happen and started to get very disappointed I kept it in and did not tell anybody exept a guy from Venezuela because he did not spoke english and I knew he would not tell anybody even if I told him, to my surprise he stated he was having the same feelings and wanted to get out and go back to his country but did not have the means to get back to his country plus they had confiscated his passport so if he asked for it they would know he wanted to leave so he was stuck. I left the church after that and never came back Im not sure what ever happened to him.
- 5. Why did you choose to stay in the Church of
- I did not, I just lasted one month and a half and left, I realized it was going to be a bumpy road and that it was not the Utopic wold I had in mind, and I was concerned about geting skills to work in the real world. I was expecting to see in there a lot of uptone people (some are) and a very positive eviroment but it was more like a military boot camp. One thing I learened, I learned to work hard and apreciate a regular job with a real pay. now Im glad to work but Im also glad to get paid. the Knoledge report make it impossible to be friends with anybody in there, I was very discoraged to find out I could not have real friendship with anybody since it was all busines busines busines, work work work and walk the line or somebody will tell on you.
- 6. Were you staff or public? If staff, was it at a mission or
an org? Were you ever in the Sea Org or OSA? Which unit? If not on
staff, did you ever volunteer to 'help out'?
- I was public for about a week then I became staff at the SO at the CC in Hollywood.
- 7. Why did you leave the Church of Scientology? Was there a
- The final straw was to find out that I was getting deeper and deeper in debt, later on I find out if you quit they will give you a free loaders bill, I was also concerned about my mother because she did not know where I was, and I had always helped her economically I know she would be concerned if I stopped helping her out, I brought it up to the lady that hired me to work for free, and she told me you can make a lot of money in here, I sai how, she told me selling books you would have to go out on the street and sell books and I said when? if I have ot be here at 7am and leave at 9pm and she told me we will see what we can do. later on she came back and she told me I had to write a letter of disconection to my mother, I was totaly flabergasted!!!! how can I write a letter of disconection to my mother when she does't even know that scientology exist? I was mad but did not show it. but I had a plan; run as fast as I can, out of there. my hart was broken how can sombody ask me to disconect from my mother just because I was concerned about her well being. that lady told me especifically what I should said in the letter , she told me writhe down "that this is the last letter Im sending to you and you probably will never hear from me ever again" she told me write it down and show it to me before you send it, I said I dont want to do that my mother doesnt even know Scn. exist, she told me well you have to do it. so I said that is that, that is totally stupid, there is no reason in here, nobody is reasoning about anything in here, we all have to march like robots and do muster every day at 12pm and scream WE COME BACK, WE COME BACK, WE COME BACK. and nobody gives a crap about my well being or my personal liefe I realized then I was being palyed and I was just a pice of the puzle in the game and I was being used to play the game, whatever game it is they are playaing, but sure enough is not to get as much auditing as posible on the street or to get the planet clear at all or to improve anybody, if anything I noticed the people that claimed to be in higher levels look to me to be more Introverted rather than extroverted. I wont say they did not feel good inside, because that is the reason you stay the technology and the books DO WORK and you feel good and you have cognitions and you have litle wins here and there, and thats why people stay, but everybody looks introverted inthere because of the Knoledge reports on each other you do not have real friends in there. the reason they make you stick with each other inthere is because slowly they get in your head that the world out there is dangerous and you better stay in there otherwise the hell of the world out there is gonna get you. I been out as I was out before I went in there, so that did not scared me, I knew I came from out there so how am I gonna be affraid to go out there again. I did notice something do; once I got out, the world out here there is alot more psichotics and neurotics than in there "the normal" pople that we know out here they are ussually psichotic or neurotic versus the people you meet in there, the world definitly need scientology people need to work more on their own cases and improve themselves. Im not aginast the books or the tecknology, it do works, Im against the misuse of people and unfair advantage that they take on the people they hire in to work for free, a lot of manual labor,a lot of work and no pay. that is not going to work at the end.
- 8. Do you think the Church of Scientology needs to change some
of its practices? If so, what should be changed? How did those
practices affect your life?
- The church needs to make itself more affordable for the comon peple, the prices are excesibly high, so basically is a religion that is only affrodable to the rich,the big shot movie stars, and the other option is you SELL your life and your free will, and put your self in their hads for the mis use and misadvantage of you, how about self determinisim so much preached by LRH on his books? once you are inside the church you do not have selfdetermminism at all, is dead, you are part of a program and you either run with the program or you are in trouble those are the options, you are either filthy rich or you sell your life.
- 9. If the items you listed in the previous question were
changed, would you consider rejoining or staying in the Church of
Scientology? If so, why?
- Only if they were totaly open and let me have my selfdeterminism and do courses when I want to not when they want to, only if the prices were more affordable. what is scary is that Scn. is infiltraiting itself in schools and in politics and people dont even know it. it would be scary to have the country run by a buch of Scientologist I hope it never hapen, if you think taxes are bad now I just wander how it would be if the president and members of the cabinet were Scientologist, imagin that.
- 10. Any additional comments you would like to make?
- If you really want to lern about Scientology, buy the books on line. you dont have to pay $300 for a set of lectures at the church, make sure you read both sides of the story on line before you make your descition to start your path in scientology, once you are in your are not allowed to go out till you wake up 20 years later and run out and blow. and even then you will be treated by the church as a criminal and they will turn they back on you as if they never knew you. after I left I got a phone call a month later from sombody from OSA telling me "you are dead" what church intended to do good call sombody and tell them you are dead just because I dont want to continue practicing? that is unherd off but thats how scn. people operate like, once again is not the knoledge is not the tech that is wrong is the way things are bing run and the way the upper management manipulates the lower strata of scientologyst (the good intentioned people) the people at the front of the PR putting a good face for scint. thats the good people, the managment watch out they do not practice what they preach. even up to today Im still paranoid and afraid they might find out where I am. Thank you for giving me a chance to tell my story.